Category Archive

Number one sign that Susan is completely focused on composing emails to potential employers:

* ………….. shhhh splish! splish! ssslop *

Uh-oh. Oh shit. No, that can’t be the running bath overflowing?! No no shit shit . . . Ohhhhhhhhh damnit.

It’s a spillage of 20-30 towel magnitude. In the midst of my embarrassment and contrition for being so negligent, I still manage to take note of how the lapping low waters reflect the light so that it dances on the bottom of the bathroom door. “Oh how lovely :)” thinks she-doofus.

No respectable mop in sight, I begin the hero’s journey of ridding the bathroom floor of its floodwaters using a plastic bag and my cupped scooper hand. (Hands are really the most ingenious invention ever. This occurs to me at least once a month.) As I’m there squatting on a poor soggy towel, scooping water into a plastic bag to be tipped out into the shower, a question suddenly occurs to me. “Should I stay here and continue to scoop water until it’s sufficiently cleared, which will take an unknown but certainly extremely long amount of time; or should I go back and finish that email I was working on first? I mean, I’m almost finished and I was just getting into the groove of sounding intelligent. Hmmmmm……..”

I’m telling you, all bathrooms should have a slanting floor. I mean nature knows that slopes and water go together.

In this post I briefly mentioned a conversation I had with one American guy on my travels; a nice, smart and well-spoken guy who was taking a short holiday in Europe in-between military training activities. A friend reading the post picked up on the casual mention of this conversation and asked me the following question in the comments:

Hey Susi, why don’t (or didn’t) you believe in a human’s inherent right to life? Just curious.

When I started this reply I was going to put it as a comment following his, but then it got longer and longer and I realised that perhaps it should be a post of its own. I was reluctant to make it one because there are a ton of other “real” posts I have been intending on completing, and because this is a highly personal topic. I’m very opinionated but at the same time I don’t want it to seem as if I’m trying to convert others to my point of view. You can take it or leave it or turn it into a paper crane to hang up from your ceiling. To be honest it does bother me that I could hurt someone’s feelings by saying what I say, what I hope is that this is only short-lived and can be put into perspective. Of course if anyone finds what I have said off-base or cruel or stupid, you can tell me personally or in the comments.

Why did I make it a post if I was really so worried it would be offensive? Well mainly because I did want to leave it in the comments section as a public answer to his question, yet at the same time I was suspicious of my desire to leave it there in this old post that people who usually read my blog probably wouldn’t see again. It indicated to me that I cared enough about this question to want to deal with it openly, yet also felt like I needed to hide it by burying it somewhere where people who know me wouldn’t find it. Totally disingenuous. Read the rest of this entry »

The preceding post “Making a difference” was written by my very first guest blogger, my mum. I will post my related contribution shortly (either tonight or tomorrow), but now I have to go read it myself

Case study#2: Twenty-something Malagasy guy in rundown cafe in Antananarivo, January 2004

I was sitting in a nice restaurant in Tana one evening having dinner with the head of the non-governmental organisation (NGO) I was working as a volunteer with. He took me out to dinner on a few occasions as he enjoyed the company and conversation, and probably also enjoyed the opportunity to be indulgent to someone. During one of the stories that the NGO head was telling I scanned the room behind him with my eyes, just… I dunno, I wasn’t bored but I was just suddenly curious about the other characters who were making up the scene in this fancy place. As I did so my eyes fell on this one guy who was sitting at the end of a long table of happy, laughing diners, who consisted partly of members from Madagascar’s most internationally-noted musical group at that time. He was looking my way as well and smiled. I smiled back.

Later in the evening I went to the toilets, there was just a one-person room for use by men and women, and when I came out saw him waiting outside the door. He gave me a nice Hi, which I reciprocated as I headed down the stairs back to the table. About 40 minutes later I made a second trip to the toilets, and lo and behold he was behind the door the second time I came out as well. Only this time he followed his Hi with asking me if I’d like to do something with him the next day. Read the rest of this entry »

In an eatery in the Berlin central railway station an older American couple were carrying their trays of food and searching for somewhere to sit. They put their trays down on the table next to mine on the opposite side and drop a hat onto the place directly beside me. I’m sitting at the end of a long table next to the wall made out of glass.

“Now we’ve claimed our places.” The older woman declares with some sense of achievement.

However they remain standing appearing still unsure of themselves until their third member comes along. As he does so, the two Germans who were sitting further along at the middle of the table get up and leave.

The Americans take this as an opportunity to move their trays up to the middle of the table, where the Germans had been, the older man’s pack still at the end of the table opposite me.

“Great, now we can spread out and not have to sit one atop the other” the older man chirps happily.

Bag on the end, clearly claiming the seat opposite mine. The table beside me with its two facing chairs are empty, except for the small bag the younger man has placed on the one that sits beside me. The hat that had been beside me as well as various other handheld items have now been placed on the other side of the couple, spread out over the places at the free end of the table. Read the rest of this entry »

You have to check out this post, currently the hot post on wordpress.com :

Top 10 Halo Pick-Up Lines

Now this sort of creativity, intelligence, nerdiness and cheekiness I can appreciate. I particularly like the grenade one :)) Actually, also the access to the base one.

A quick update and dedication before I continue on with the posts I am currently writing.

Update: I am in Switzerland for a short stay while I decide my next move. Italy in particular looks to be on the cards soon.

Dedication: I’ve today come across Idiolect, a blog that has posted some great quotes as well as some interesting discussion. This is where I found the following quote, which goes out to you mum.

People think of good and bad teachers as engaged in the same activity, as if education was a substance, and that bad teachers supply a little of the substance, and good teachers supply a lot. This makes it difficult to understand that education can be a destructive process, and that bad teachers are wrecking talent, and that good and bad teachers are engaged in opposite activities.

Keith Johnstone, in Impro

Right on. I’m glad that you fight the good fight.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to write about this as it’s nothing but vitriol and spit. The latest incident of today clinched it.

I was walking through my last stretch of Vondelpark (in Amsterdam) contemplating having a hot drink at the nearby film museum cafe. I take the corner, turn my head to look at the stereo blasting some reggae, turn it back round and keep walking straight ahead. Some seconds later a man on a bicycle is crossing my path so I try to step more to the side, and still he cycles across to get in my way. Cycles to a stop, blocking me with his bike and his mass, and turning his front wheel into me.

“……………?” he asks as I take some trouble to move on around him, pretty thoroughly pissed at this stage.

“Excuse me?” I respond, still walking on. Read the rest of this entry »

Like a hyperactive small dog with my to-ing and fro-ing, I am now back in Switzerland and writing this post on the eve of my departure for Germany. A number of reasons contributed to my exit from France, none of which are especially provocative so no need to worry. One simple way of explaining it is to say that I picked sides. No one ever asked me to of course, my allegiance to France loosened of its own accord following a number of incidents, which include watching one young French guy express great disgust after hearing that I had tried to learn some Swiss German (Schwiizerdütsch) while in Switzerland. In his response I saw several things: intolerance, a sense of superiority for his own culture, and ignorance about what Swiss German actually is - i.e. pretty different in numerous respects to German. Swiss German folk speak both Swiss German and (High)German, while Germans have genuine difficulty understanding Schwiizerdütsch. Swiss German is technically a spoken language, and only turns up in written form in informal mediums of communication such as email and internet writings.

I find the language in stark contrast to the image and understanding most people would have of Switzerland and its citizens. Namely that of being orderly, reserved, clean ( ) and staid.

It’s a language that implies movement. Simply put, its sounds are very up and down. Descriptively put, some parts of their words create sounds like that of a smallish round stone plopping into the river; of sand shaken within a container to slosh against and fall back from its walls. Of an object pushing into and then bounding off of a material that’s slightly elastic but still innately taut; and of a spring being twisted closer and closer around into itself. Read the rest of this entry »

You can never quite tell what’s going on today because it’s all relative. When someone has a low opinion of another, this other usually has a low opinion of that someone back. What do you base your accuracy on then in deciding who’s right or who is the baddie in the situation, except on which of them it is you like more?

You can only get a “truth” if you choose a side. Or maybe what this is saying is that you can only get truths if you have already experienced them yourself. Because how do you choose a side if not based on your pre-existing values? And in this case, aren’t you merely reinforcing what you already think? You treat it as if you’re intelligently appraising a situation when in actual fact you are finding the quickest route to reminding yourself how right you are… Read the rest of this entry »

Unfortunately this time I have no pictures. Please don’t shun me and read on anyway, if you have the answer your recompense is my happiness…

Question: Why will we more readily give a homeless person a cigarette than some spare change?

Hypotheses of my own:

1. Perhaps it is because they can only do one thing with it, you know how it will be used. Hmm… this suggests some kind of paternalistic control need being filled…

2. Perhaps it is because there is some sort of kinship felt between smokers. A kinship based on shared knowledge of the physical feeling you get from having a smoke and from needing a smoke when one is not readily available.

3. Perhaps it is because money seems more valuable than a cigarette. Though this is what prompted me to ask this question in the first place, because with how much a pack costs these days, the literal cost of each cigarette must be similar to spare change you might give anyway. Ah, but then again of course money is always going to be more valuable because you can do anything with it, unlike a cigarette…

Ideas ideas, but I’d be curious to hear especially from people who do smoke and have engaged in this smoker’s generosity. It doesn’t necessarily have to be towards a homeless person either… It’s just seemed to me that many smokers are quite relaxed about sharing their cigarettes, even though these are precious items to them. Or maybe… smokers’ reliance on cigarettes makes them more aware of karma, that they’ll only get when they’re in need if they give to others. I’ve definitely noticed though that there is less reluctance to give up a cigarette than a couple of coins.

*Gasp*! *Choke choke GASP*

http://brainsciencpodcast.wordpress.com/

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Soooo tasty.

I know I´m in Granada now but still got a couple more things to say about San Sebastián. It won´t happen tonight but sometime over the next week. I also hope to get more photos up because I really really need my memory cards free

 Otherwise, blog wandering again today: Mass murders, zeta males, and virtual life and The worst school massacre in American history: not Virginia Tech.

One day I will find some peaches and cream, one day.

I now really want to watch the documentary discussed in this post*. Hope I find a way to watch it since I doubt it´ll be widely screened. Other than that I enjoyed her posts from the month of August; it´s great to get a peek into the process and concerns of a young filmmaker. Not to mention, go AZN PrYde! [Deathly serious about how much I am kidding, kidding, about that declaration...]

Sometimes blogs annoy me but on this particular morning I´m grateful that blogs like hers let me vicariously live other lives, other identities.

*NB: Not light-hearted fare

I have some questions, which will be posed with the help of visual aids. Unfortunately I cannot for the life of me figure out how to get the damn pictures to actually load on this page so I will simply link them. I´m sorry! I know I´m so late 90s…

Instrucciones: There are three questions. Observe the photos of each question and reflect for as long as you wish. If you know the answer, I would be most grateful if you could place it in the comments or email me. Or, tell someone who does email me. Read the rest of this entry »

It sucks unspeakably so that upon thinking of the word ¨confessions¨I hear the song by Usher. Die die die!

#1. I have really missed my family. Travelled all my life, mostly without giving them too much thought if any. Maybe it´s because of the small size of the school and the way in which people come so quickly together to form a new, young, mixed-up style of family. It´s so easy to make friends here and to spend all your time with other foreigners. Familiarity and a form of intimacy develop very quickly: first you have class together in the morning, and then you hang out together in your free time making excursions to other towns, trying out new activities together, and going out all night to bars and discos. This sounds ideal, and was ideal in the beginning. But apparently things have been moving too quickly for me. These are people who are multi-lingual, have great social skills, are by and large attractive and smart. They´re people you would show off as friends, for their life and their easiness. But my real family is a particular brand of weird, my favourite brand of weird. And as I´ve tried to slip into this new family, I haven´t been able to help but feel how immediately convenient this self-sustaining world of happy young foreigners is, and how much I miss real queerness.    

#2. I´ve been popping in DVDs of saccarine, OTT, Hollywoodian romantic comedies simply because they´re the only ones in the house and are a guaranteed hour and a half´s worth of complete immersion in English. I´d been puzzling over why I´ve felt the need to do this considering my interactions with the other students (German, Swedish, Dutch, Brazilian, North American) are mostly in English. Figured it out… there´s a difference between using this type of convivial/survival English and being able to take for granted the long unbroken flow of native speakers. Watching these movies is equivalent to taking a luxurious soak in a warm bubble bath for my brain. I never thought I was so mother-tongue-centric. This is shocking.

Okay, so if you look to the left there on what is technically supposed to be the Blogroll  I have a link to my photos on Flickr. I haven´t put all that I have up yet, these ones are only of a bit of home (for my benefit really), Paris and my accomodation in Luz. I have a couple more of the Pyrénées and an extremely limited number of Biarritz because I didn´t get around to recharging my battery. Well, the camera´s battery.

But, I think I will write some more about the Pyrénées and Biarritz before putting the photos up. I´m just horribly anal and sequential like that.  

And just a tip, I recommend trying out the slideshow on Flickr. I´m easily impressed sure, it made me feel like I was watching an advertisement… Plus that´s the option for you if you don´t want to read my commentary accompanying the pictures

 Happy looking!

 Update: The link is broken. Sigh. I know why, but at this stage I don´t know how to fix it and I don´t have the time right now to look for the smarter way to add such a link, I know people do it all the time. Accept my low-tech solution: http://www.flickr.com/photos/7517188@N04/

Update #2: HAHA! I totally did it! Yeah, you can either click on this link here or you can click on the photos you see in the sidebar. Doo dee doo dee doo.

A bit of a suprise now: I have taken pictures. Since my last full day in Paris. So hopefully I get them up sometime in the next few days. I´m not sure if I can put them on separate pages here or if I will link to some other service where it is really easy to store photos. You are informed that I do not consider myself a photographer, there are occasions when I can’t even stop a photo from being wonky, let alone care about the light and focus. Fortunately the game of odds does suggest that a few will turn out to be visually pleasing or interesting however.

Wow, I am absolutely shattered right now. I’ve made the move from Luz to Biarritz, it’s not really such a big deal, two little bus trips and a 2h train. Ohhhhh yeah I’m probably shattered because of the walking up hill on snow and attempts at snowboarding the day before, in addition to carrying my 20kg pack on back and other items in hand. It’s scary how quickly I forget things. So I’m going to attempt to write a bit… you’ll have to excuse my English. It is my first language but a tired brain knows no sense in any language.